All women need a confidence boost every now and again, to remind themselves that they're beautiful, not just outside but inside too. I know the world focuses a lot on external beauty, and this may be a bit against the grain, but sometimes it's okay to focus on the outside too, because when you are happy with who you are externally it's usually a reflection that you're happy with who you are internally as well.
I can't tell you how many mornings (especially as a teenager), I would wake up, look in the mirror, and just be frustrated. Frustrated that my hair never looked the way I wanted it to, frustrated that I could never get my makeup just right, frustrated that I didn't have the cool clothes or even really a cool style. I wore the same thing all the time, jeans and a t-shirt, black pants and a t-shirt, probably until I was at least in my early twenties. I don't even think I owned a nice dress until I was 25... and no jokes, I bought my first skirt after a decade long drought without one, two weeks ago!
Being so frustrated all the time with the outside was a direct reflection of how I felt on the inside. I was frustrated with myself. I didn't know who I was, who I wanted to be, who I was supposed to be, who the world wanted me to be, who my parents wanted me to be, who I even could be. I was frustrated all the time, and how I felt on the inside was a direct correlation to how I felt on the outside. I was truly miserable.
It took a very long time to get to where I'm at now: I leave the house most days without makeup, but if I want to do my makeup I know how. All my clothes in my closet bring me joy and I've purged the ones that don't. Getting dressed isn't deciding between 5 outfits I hate, but instead between 5 outfits I love and feel great in. I have gained and lost weight since being a teenager a decade ago, and I'm totally okay with that. I love myself for who I am right now, inside and out and being a boudoir photographer allows me to help other women find that feeling too.
I do a lot of trade shows in Lethbridge and the towns surrounding us, and I meet so many women at each of them. It's so interesting to see women's reactions to my table. Some come over to admire, others blush and walk away, and others share a feeling with me that I hear way too much! They say, "I could never do that, I need to lose weight first." I have always wondered why as women we place so much value in our body, why how we feel about ourselves depends on how we feel we look, but then I met the incredible Miss P featured in this article, and I finally understood this whole thing.
Miss P was one of the most confident clients I've ever had. She has such a warm and bubbly personality, and really just exudes confidence entirely. I really admire how she carries herself, how she brings kindness and genuineness and just badassness with her everywhere she goes, and she does it with grace and confidence, and she's a curvy gal. Sometimes not all of these things go hand in hand.
What Miss P made me realize is that if you are happy with your insides, it enables you to be happy with your outsides. You don't need to lose weight to feel confident, you need to do things that make you feel confident in order to feel confident. That is the essence of a boudoir session. Just as you need to fuel your body with energy to have energy to do things, you need to fuel your confidence with confidence boosting things to feel confident. Was that a mouthful?
A boudoir session really does boost your confidence because it's a reminder to love yourself where you are now. So many things in the world, especially in the media, focus on the next best thing, the next best you, the next best diet, the next best fad or trend or style or insert any noun here you want. There is never a focus on now, it's always on what's next, where you're going, what you could look like if only you did this or that, who you could be if only you changed this thing or that. And in my opinion, it's all garbage.
YOU ARE A BAD ASS WOMAN AND YOU CAN RULE YOUR OWN WORLD IF YOU SO CHOOSE. All you need to do is believe that that statement is true, and you're already on your path to ruling your own world. You don't need to change, you don't need to be any different than how you are right now in order to love, appreciate and respect yourself. All you need to do is stop focusing on what's next, be in this moment, and love who you are in this moment. A boudoir session really is that stopper, that allows you to see that in this exact moment YOU are IN-CRE-DI-BLE!
Yes, you are beautiful. Yes, you are sexy. Yes, you have a beautiful smile. Yes, your presence counts. Yes, you are needed in this world. Yes, you matter. Yes, you.
Thanks to Miss P for helping me have this revelation, I know someone out there needed to hear it, and I know Miss P is rocking her life daily, just like she rocked her boudoir session!
Hair & Make-up by Katt Panic Makeup Artistry
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